Mom: Gone for 6 years and Counting

It has been 6 years since Mom died and I still can't believe it. I miss her every day and this year is the first anniversary of her death that I haven't been in Bismarck for it. This is a little something I wrote when I was in the sixth grade. We had the assignment to interview someone and I chose to interview Mom.


 
Karen McGee Atwood

By Elizabeth K Atwood

Written in the 6th Grade

Karen McGee Atwood was born on April 29, 1954, in Salt Lake

City, UT. She grew up in Brigham City, UT. “Between when I was

growing up and when I graduated from high school we lived in five houses,” she said. Karen went to Central Elementary, the only Junior High, and Box Elder High. They were the only schools went up to graduating from high school. Some subjects she had were French, PE, Math, English, and History, to name just a few. Her favorite subject wasMath, I asked why and she said, “I just did.”

It was the year 1965 when she was my age. “The thing I remember most was being teased at school,” she said. When she was my age the person who was president was Lyndon Baines Johnson. The most significant event that occurred during her childhood was when President Kennedy was killed. She admired her mother most because of the way she treated other people.

Karen did different things, she once mopped the kitchen floor, and

cleaned her room. Her favorite singer was Barry Manilow. A Wrinkle in Time was her favorite book. Her favorite hobby was reading. The kinds of things she enjoyed doing most were reading and cooking. She wore clothes.

Karen wanted to be a teacher when she grew up. She pursued the

career bookkeeping after high school. She is a Newspaper Carrier today.

What she dislikes most about her job is not getting enough sleep. “I like getting the papers to customers,” she said. She is married and has five children. Rebecca is 17, Clarence is 15, Rachel is 14, Elizabeth is 11, and Sara is 9.

Her plans for the future are to get out of debt. “Study hard, do your

schoolwork,” she said was the best advice she could give me.

Graduation and BYU

I will be finally finishing up studying at Bismarck State College in a couple weeks and will be graduating on May 10th.

I have applied to Brigham Young University in Provo, UT and I was accepted. I start this fall, majoring in Statistical Science. I plan to head down on the 17th of May, so, I can get settled and everything before I start.

Mom's Favorite Recipes

For quite a while I have been working on a book of my mom's favorite recipes. Rachel suggested that I get it published, that there were some websites that could do that. I have recently completed it. This is what the front and back covers of my book look like:

  

In the book, I have included a picture of Mom on nearly every page, a brief description of the history of how it came to be a favorite for every recipe, and a Nutrition Facts chart for every recipe.

Here are a few of example pages from the book:

Eight Years Ago Today. . .

Eight years ago today, we had the fire in our house that killed my brother, Clarence, Rachel's cat, 'Lil Ben, and our cat, Cougar. A few months later I had to do a poetry project for my English class. I made a book, of six poems I wrote about those who died in the fire.

The first three were written the night of the fire. While the others were written when I was trying to come up with what I'd do for my poetry project.

Clarence Ray Atwood
Birth: June 4, 1983
Salt Lake City, UT
Death: November 7, 2002
Bismarck, ND
He said,
He was not sure
About going on a mission.
Then was the day He left us,
And went
On his mission.
Although,
We may not see him
For many years to come.
To some,
He is dead,
But to us,
He's just away
For a while,
Until that day,
When we will see him again.


Cougar Atwood
Birth: March 26, 1989
Bismarck, ND
Death: November 7, 2002
Bismarck, ND

That was the day,
The day he was waiting for.
He had a good long life.
He was on medication
For many years.
The last few years,
He had growled
Anytime he moved
Or was moved.
The reason was
That his body hurt;
I thought
He had arthritis.
Now, his pain is gone!
He no longer has arthritis;
He had a full life.
Maybe,
We might see him again,
Someday.


'Lil Ben Atwood
Birth: November 9, 2000
Las Vegas, NV
Death: November 7, 2002
Bismarck, ND

Ben had a very unfair disadvantage.
He died that day,
All because of a dryer
Catching on fire.
For Cougar,
It was different.
He lived a long life,
While Ben lived
For less than 2 years.
Rachel will miss him,
And so will we.
We shall miss them all.
One of the greatest things
He had
Was Rachel,
And her love for him.


Cougar

He left.
He left that day,
And my life will never be the same,
The world will never be the same again.
He's gone:
The one who ate grass at times,
Who lay down or sat in his litter box,
Who would get mad,
Whenever, he saw Rachel's 'lil guy.
He's the one who slept on my pillow,
The last few months He was here.

He died.
He died that day.
He was old. . .
Thirteen in always old for them,
While Rachel's 'lil guy was almost two,
It doesn't seem fair
That Rachel's 'lil guy went with him too.
He died:
The one who jumped on my neck
When I was three,
Before Rachel's 'lil guy ever lived,
Or before, SHE was born.

He's dead.
He was dead that day,
And all we have left
Are the pictures and memories.
He's gone:
The one who often hit HER
With His little soar paws,
And rubbed them over the bald spots on His head.
And He who attacked Rachel's 'lil guy,
And practically growled at him,
Anytime He saw him.

He's gone.
He was gone that day,
And SHE's still here with us.
Although, He left with Rachel's 'lil guy
And the boy.
He died:
He who was my favorite cat,
Who attacked Rachel's 'lil guy,
Rachel's 'lil cat, 'Lil Ben,
Who attacked HER,
Our only dog,
Our dog, Sugar.

He died.
He died that day,
The cat who slept a lot.
The cat who
Who felt like his space was being invaded,
That we didn't care
For Him as much
As we used to.
He's dead:
The one who ached,
Who ached all over
The last few years of His life:
Personally, I thought He had arthritis.
The cat who
Who felt like Sugar was invading Him
And 'Lil Ben, too.
The cat who died,
From breathing unclean air,
Caused by the accident,
That killed
The boy, my brother, Clarence,
And the kitten, Rachel's 'lil guy, 'Lil Ben,
And the cat, my favorite cat, Cougar.


What's Going On?

I had no idea,
No idea what was going on.
I was confused,
Confused about the situation.
I woke up,
And something was wrong,
I wasn't sure
What it was.

I tried
Tried to wake him,
It was no use,
No use at all.
He was sound asleep.
I jumped on him,
It didn't help.

I left his room.
In the room next to his,
There was a bright,
Very bright, Thing,
I felt heat coming from it,
And a black fog of some sort,
A fog that hurt my eyes.

I started up,
Up the stairs.
I knew something was wrong,
Very wrong.
I needed to find,
To find help.
Why didn't Clarence wake up,
When I jumped on him?
There has to be someone,
Someone around here
That can help.

I searched for someone,
Anyone,
Anyone who could help him.
It was very hard to see
Through the black stuff,
As I was moving through the house.
I went into the room,
The room that Cougar often went to.
Cougar was there,
There, on that pillow,
The pillow he usually sleeps on.
He was sleeping,
Sleeping very happily.
But Elizabeth wasn't there,
Where was she?

I saw Sara,
Sara asleep in her bed,
The bed she often took me to,
The bed I liked,
Because it had a window.
Oh, how I love to look,
To look out windows.
I jumped on her.
She didn't wake up.
I jumped on her again.
She still didn't wake up.
What's going on?
Why won't she wake up, either?
Since, I couldn't wake her up,
I decided that,
That I needed to find someone else,
Someone else to help him.

I went into the room,
The room with the big, flat surfaces
Held up by wooden sticks.
There, I saw him, I saw Ben,
The one that Rachel brought.
Oh, how I love Rachel,
She comforted me,
My first night here,
When I was all alone,
All alone and crying.

He was awake,
Unlike Clarence, Sara, and Cougar.
I went back downstairs to see,
To see if I could wake him up.
I saw that the big, hot thing
Had gotten bigger,
And I still couldn't wake him up.

I headed back up the stairs,
I couldn't see anything,
Nothing at all,
The black stuff
Was too thick.
My eyes hurt,
They hurt really bad.

Then, I saw some people,
Some people I had never,
Never seen before,
Entering the house,
Coming through the door,
So, I darted outside,
I had to find help!

I ran out in the backyard,
I saw the gate open,
I knew I wasn't supposed to,
Supposed to leave the backyard,
But this was an emergency!

I ran across the street,
Up to the corner,
I went down that block,
I decided,
Decided to see
If anyone could help.
I turned onto the next side,
Next side of that block. I ran down that block,
Then, down the next,
Looking,
Only searching,
For help.

I saw someone,
Someone that seemed familiar,
He stuck me in his yard,
I didn't want to be in his yard,
So, I looked for a way out,
And I found it.
So, he took me back,
Back to my house.
I saw Rachel's friends,
Heather and Erin,
They took me from him,
Then, I figured that I've found help!

I tried,
Tried to take them
To Clarence,
To help him.
But they pulled me,
Pulled me in the opposite direction,
And put me in that,
In that kind of thing,
The thing that my family
Had put me in before,
Whenever we went away,
Away for a week or so.

It was the thing,
The thing that moved.
Looking out the window of it
Was so fascinating,
Much more fascinating than
The windows at our house.
I always felt tortured
When they were all outside,
Stuffing things in it and on it,
Leaving me stuck inside.
Of course, they never left left me behind,
Like they did to Cougar every year.

Rachel's friends
Took me to a place,
A place I had never seen before,
And they left me there.
That night, I saw Her,
I saw Rachel again!
I was so excited!
She had been away
For several months,
Someone in my family is alright!
The next day,
I saw Elizabeth
And Becky,
Becky, who I hadn't seen since,
Since July,
When she came,
Came to see me!

Rachel, Becky, and Elizabeth came,
Came to see me everyday
(Rachel and Becky 3 times a day).
But no other family members:
No Clarence,
No Sara,
No Mom or Dad.
Where were they?
Did something bad happen to them?

Mom came
With Rachel, Becky, and Elizabeth,
And took me to that place
But Dad was there!
They put me on a table
And the weird guy examined me.
A couple weeks after,
After I had seen Clarence last,
I saw Mom and Sara!
But where's Clarence?
Later that day,
I saw Sara, Elizabeth, Mom, and Dad!
But no Clarence.
He's supposed to be here too!

Did something bad happen to him?
Where did he go?
How is a dog, like me, to know?
How can I, Sugar,
Just an ordinary dog, know?
Will I ever see him again?


Rachel's 'Lil Friend

He was Rachel's friend:
Rachel's 'Lil Friend.
But He left,
He left her,
Left her without saying,
Without saying anything,
Without saying, “Goodbye.”

She was away,
Away at school.
She had no chance,
No opportunity,
To say, “Goodbye,”
Or even to see Him one last time,
Before He went away,
Far away,
Far enough
To be out of reach from Rachel,
From Rachel's eyes and ears,
But not out of her mind,
Never out of her mind.

He left,
Left this world,
This world as we know it.
And she loved Him,
Loved Him so much,
And I'm sure he loved her too.
He was not even two,
And He died,
He died.
And He was her 'lil guy,
Her 'lil cat: 'Lil Ben.
He left,
Left with her brother and mine,
Our brother, Clarence;
And the cat: My favorite cat, Cougar.
'Lil Ben may be gone,
But His memory
Will always live on,
Always,
In her heart
And in her mind.

Promises and Leaving

On the 17th, Sara and I got somehow got on the topic of books and I mentioned the Chronicles of Narnia, Sara's only read The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe which she said she didn't like how C S Lewis wrote it. I brought up my favorite of the series, The Horse and His Boy that she didn't know if she'd like it or not. So, Sara proposed a deal. She said that she'd read The Horse and His Boy if I read a book of her choosing. I added the guidelines that the book had to be fiction (she likes to read books on Chinese history) and not too much longer than The Horse and His Boy. Sara chose Pride and Prejudice. After hearing about our tell and overhearing me tell Sara that I always keep the promises I make regarding books, Rachel insisted upon me promising to read a book of hers, so after I finish Pride and Prejudice, I'm going to read The Brothers Karasmosov as promised. I started reading Pride and Prejudice the following day.

Rachel woke me up at 4:30 am on Wednesday the 19th, so Sara and I could clean the apartment while Rachel drove the car Sara would be driving once she gets her license with Sara's stuff in it to Brigham City. Then, that afternoon, Rachel, Sara, and I drove to Brigham City (Sara was LITERALLY buried in the back seat). There, we dropped Sara off and got a few things we had to store out of the car (Sara was too big to fit everything before.) Then, we were on our way back to Bismarck. We got home in the late morning on Thursday.

A Trip to Utah

A few days ago on Thursday, August 13th, Rachel and I bought some snacks for a trip to Utah. There was a family reunion this weekend. We arrived in the Provo-Orem area around 2:30 am on Friday. After driving from Bismarck beginning at 11:30 am. We had a few place to go Friday morning, Rachel needed a carrier for Gizmo.

Then, around 10:55 am, I went for a walk, to the Orem Distribution Center where I wanted to see about replacing the August 2008 New Era and Ensign that Dad lost while I was in Utah last summer. They didn't have it but I got the other books I wanted added to my collection. I bought The Book of Mormon (missionary edition, in English and French; I already have it in Spanish); The Children's Songbook (in English and Spanish, I already have it in French; I also have the Hymns of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in English, French, and Spanish), and The Children's Songbook cds (in Spanish; I already them in English, French, and Japanese). Then, I went next door to Deseret Book and wrote down prices of possible things to get and I walked across the street to Seagull Book. There, I ended up buying the DVDs: American Mormon, American Mormon in Europe, Beauty and the Beast: A Latter Day Tale, Return with Honor, Pride and Prejudice (LDS version), Mormon Myth-ellaneous, and One Man's Treasure there. I also bought the CDs: Musical Journey Through the Book of Mormon (children's songs), Every Breath (Jenny Phillips), Whispered Visions (Chris Heimerdinger), Light Keepers (Jenny Phillips), and Safety of His Arms (Lauri Carrigan). I also bought A Banner Is Unfurled #3, Samuel #3, a C S Lewis Journal, and 3 note pads that can go on the fridge for our shopping list. After that I went back to Deseret Book because there were a couple of CDs there that I really wanted that Seagull Book didn't have. There, I bought the DVD Rigoletto and the CDs: LDS Scripture Rock:Book of Mormon (CD/DVD combo) and LDS Scripture Rock: New Testament (CD/DVD combo). I already had the CDs for the Old Testament and the Doctrine and Covenants.

Later, we went up to where the family reunion would be. And we stayed until Saturday evening when we drove back to Orem.

MY GOLDEN BIRTHDAY and MOVING OUT

On June 22nd, it was my golden birthday. For my birthday, Dad gave me the DVD, Errand of Angels and the books, Abinadi by H B Moore and The Book of Mormon Sleuth #5 (which will be added to Mom's collection of books since she had the first 4 in the series). Rachel gave me a game I've wanted for over a year called, Harry Potter CLUE, it has Harry Potter characters with Harry Potter villains, and these Dark Cards, that you have to draw when the Dark Mark shows up, along with Help Cards that help to protect you from the Dark Cards. You also have House Points, that can be lost because of the Dark Cards and if you lose them all, you're out of the game. So, if everyone gets out, then the missing student is lost forever to darkness.

Rachel started working as an overnight stocker at Walmart with me shortly after my birthday.

At the end of July, Rachel and I found a place where Gizmo could stay with us. We had to find such a place because my dad decided that if Gizmo stayed at the house then he'd become part of the "family" and would have to learn to get along with the other animals. Also, to keep her dog from peeing in my room, Gizmo would be locked OUT of it. Dad said it's cruelty to keep Gizmo locked in that room, but I KNOW that Gizmo would prefer to be locked IN to being locked OUT with their CRAZY animals any day. Also, Dad said, "That way we'd only need one litter box," which I have no doubt, Gizmo would not have used, for the simple fact that she doesn't use the clumping kind of litter, compared to Gizmo's litter box, the litter box for her cat is filthy and disgusting, and also, when Gizmo's litter box isn't cleaned after several days he refuses to use it and he'll pee on a bed instead. So, that wouldn't have worked out anyway. So, Rachel and I found the place, it's a mobile home and we've started moving into it.